building a wall to rejection

No one likes rejection. I know I sure don’t. But if you know how to handle it, have the arguments behind you that minimize the affect of the rejection, then you are already steps ahead.

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I know that in this meeting with Mike I might be rejected. He might turn his nose up at the things I am putting forward. However I know already inside that I have the arguments in place to support my reasoning. I believe I am far more than a victim of abuse. I have said it before, I will not wear that label. I have worn it, and I wore that title for a long time. I then wore the title of survivor of abuse. Now I am beyond that. I know that it isn’t an easy thing to achieve, to become beyond that. It doesn’t mean I am any different to the person that still is the victim, or is the survivor. I know that under all the strengths I was able to build to make the person I am today, I am those titles. I always will be. You cannot take that away from me. It is my past, and I have the biggest acceptance that I am who I am because of the past. I said it yesterday, he shaped me. As much as that is hard to write, and maybe hard for you to read, he did. He raised me, and was abusing me in those really important years of life. And like I also said, I just chose certain paths to go down. I know I could have easily have gone down paths that had the end, or that had just a life where I lived ‘normal.’ But I didn’t choose those paths; this one I feel has been created off my own back.

I am not normal. I am cool with that. I have something inside of me that wants to make change, and make a difference. Even if I stand back and allow someone else to take the lead. I don’t really care. I don’t need any recognition at all. This is not about me, it is about our children. It has never been about me. I have dealt with me! I am ok with who I am.

So reject me all you can. I know I am going to have great arguments, and no matter how many brick walls are built, those pedophiles don’t stop. It is not like they are part of a dying generation.

Be Brave. H

bda

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